Over the next couple of weeks I will be sharing a small personal journey that I just completed. My journey addresses an aspect of my life that I needed to work on as it was affecting my health. I am not endorsing any products or methods for dealing with the subject of these blog posts. I am sharing my thoughts and feeling and what I decided was the best course of action for me.
A couple of years ago something changed and I just decided not to care about my health. I am not sure why. I was going through menopause, I felt depressed and on a bit of an emotional roller coaster. Life was not all that bad. My perception was that it was and that there was some elusive magic something that would make it better.
Growing up in my family, food was the answer for all situations and feelings. My grandmother had breakfast ready for us in the morning and was already planning lunch as she cleaned the kitchen. Dinner was ready when my grandfather came home from work, and we always had dessert. Always. When friends came over she made us treats. If I was sick, she would prepare a favorite food; if I was sad, there would be comfort food. Something wonderful happened, we would celebrate with food. At the holidays she baked everyone’s favorite cake or pie. I equated taking care of those you love with food.
So this is what I did. I used food for comfort. Happy, sad, angry or even bored, food was the answer.
The more weight I gained the more depressed I felt. There was also the apathy about doing something to fix the problem, on top of the menopause symptoms with mood swings, hot flashes and night sweats.
If you are wondering why I didn’t seek medical advice about these issues, I am not one to take medications unless it is absolutely the last course of action. Caffeine and ibuprofen are the only two medications I would use. If that didn’t fix it then I would just have to deal with it. I have always leaned towards a more natural or holistic approach to health (well, before I didn’t care). I have watched family members become so dependent on various medications without working on the underlying causes. They did not always find the answer in the medications and the side effects were more damaging than the initial problem. I am not against medications if one needs it and understands the benefits and risks. It’s just not something I choose to do. I want to explore what is causing the feelings and how I am responding to them and try to determine what avenue I need to try. Sometimes it just helps to talk to someone I trust or seek out advice from another source. This was enough to deal with, I thought, but there was another issue I had been putting off taking care of.
Next time, Part Two. Adding injury to the mix.